Cats Dogs And Other Pet Projects
Humanity has a love affair with pets. Just about everyone you know has or had some sort of pet in their lives at one time. There are many reasons for owning a pet, and for those of us who don't have one, an equally diverse number of reasons against having an animal in the house.
The pet revolution started back in the days of "Ugh-ugh" the caveman when even his primitive brain was able to realize that he could teach animals to do his bidding and help out with social tasks. This was a vast mental boost for the caveman, who was becoming flustered at his inability to make the cavewoman do his bidding. Used paintings on cave walls show that dogs were the first creature to be domesticated, and assisted in hunts. No doubt back then they were also used as security alarms, unbiased as they are today.
Several ancient societies, including the Egyptians, favored cats over dogs. In superstitious circles, cats are attributed to be assistants of devils, demons, and witches. It was once believed in some European countries that if a cat slept on your chest, it could literally steal your breath by sucking it out of you and cause you to die. Even with these strikes against them, cats, like dogs, are among the most popular pets in the world.
This popularity of the two animals has led to joking, belittling, and even outright animosity between "cat people" and "dog people". People who own cats have a tendency to be more independent thinkers and individualists who don't mind a bit of isolation. People who acquire dogs often seem to be more gregarious. Why is this?
Well, you've often heard the phrase that people tend to resemble their pets. That's not always true or I'd be black and white and furry. Cats are infinitely cleaner than dogs. They groom themselves constantly, licking and preening their entire body throughout the day. Dogs only have one particular portion of their body that they want to lick. Felines eat conservatively. If you leave a cat alone for a few days, it has the knowledge and ability to make its food stretch over those days. A dog will eat voraciously everything that's in front of it, no matter how distinguished there is, making it hard to leave a dog unsupervised for several days.
Cats can be trusted to be let out of the house and return on their own when they are done with whatever secret society meeting they go to when you let them out. Most dogs must be kept on a leash because they are still, for the most part, unable to control themselves when released from that leash. Cat owners will eagerly tell you that their pets are smarter than dogs, and that's why there are dog obedience schools and none for cats.
Dog owners, however, will point to the fact that dogs are loyal to them in a way that cats never could be. This is very true. Your dog will greet you with a tail wagging energetic explain of affection and slobber all over you as long as you stroke him and talk to him, but then again I once had a girl friend who did the same thing. A cat may approach to you initially and rub himself against you, but when he realizes you're not going to feed him right away, he walks off in a smug, self-confident manner and leaves you staring at its butt.
The fact that you have to take your dog out for a walk has obviously led to many people meeting while out with Fido. The classic example shown in the Disney film "101 Dalmatians" is not far from the truth. When's the last time you took your cat out for a walk?
Dogs are comical creatures. We have taught them to do all sorts of work and play over the years. We have seen frivolous dogs like the one in "Air Bud" who plays basketball. We have also marveled at the ability of dogs to search for and rescue people under such extremes as building collapses and being buried under snow. Because of this, there is no denying that dogs are definitely more useful than cats. Still, there is one thing about dogs that's hard to figure out. Why is it that if you blow on a dog's nose, he sneezes and shakes his head uncontrollably as if he detests what you're doing, yet ten minutes later when you have that same dog in your car and are going down the road at fifty miles an hour, he sticks his head out the window and enjoys having it in a breeze so strong it pins his ears to the sides of his head?
We can't employ all our time on cats and dogs, though. Let's recall a minute to speak about people who keep dinky rodents in their house. That's right, some people actually go out and spend money to sustain as pets the very animals that most of us exercise a fortune or regain a cat to get rid of: mice. Sure they're cute and exiguous and furry, but they're still mice. Hamsters fall under the same category. The thing you most have to watch out for with rodents is that once you let them out of their cage, they have hundreds of places to hide, and you'll never find them again. Rodents are nesting creatures, and they will gnaw on anything to gather stuff for that nest, including furniture, electrical wiring, and Uncle Joe's toupee.
Hamsters and other small rodents are arrive the bottom rung of the animal kingdom ladder, serving as the primary food supply for many larger creatures. This means that in the wild there must be dozens of these four legged canapés to retain each predator. Because of this, rodents are prolific reproductive machines, able to become sexually mature, pregnant, and give birth in the small span of time between two commercial breaks during your approved TV note. In spite of all this, people become as attached to their rodent as any cat or dog lover, which is very mysterious. Let's face it, why would you take a sick hamster to the vet and spend $300 to restore its health when they are two for a dollar at K-Mart?
Birds are another matter entirely. Most of them have the ability to make soothing melodious sounds, while others are extremely noisy. Some people buy parrots because they can be taught words and carry on a conversation that's better than most current TV show scripts. Some exotic birds sell for thousands of dollars in pet shops, but can you honestly justify spending the same amount of money on a bird as you would on an automobile?
Fish, with their slow, graceful movements, are often soothing to gape, but require a lot of upkeep. The temperature and saline content of the water have to be just right, and you have to be careful which fish you keep together, or you may find yourself with only one kind a fish and a lot of fish skeletons in your tank.
Yes, I know, I left a number of pet owners out of this, such as snake fanciers, Vietnamese pot-bellied pig lovers and folks who keep monkeys as companions. Those people are still a minority, and society hasn't figured them out yet. No matter what kind of pet people beget, however, they invariably keep them because they love them. Me, I've had cats, dogs, and birds over the years. Yes, I'll even admit I've had hamsters, and found they go best with a creamy bernaise sauce and a dry white wine.
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Filed under Joes Pet Meds by on Dec 19th, 2011. 
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